AAAANNNNNDDDD I'm back (again)

I'm back

I have no idea what I've been doing, but I have been thinking I need to be back..

I need a place to vent, to let go, to remind myself there is a part of me other than mother/ wife/ student/ employee. To record and reminisce.

I can't remember what has happened since July, but what I do know is...

J is trying out ballet for a term. (now wants to do little athletics - only today he was sick home from school {again}, little a's is tomorrow and I'm not risking it).

Third year nursing degree is HARD.  I'm over it. Not the difficulty - the fact that this is my 5th year. I'm done. I sorta want to quit. Technically, there's one year and 1/2 a semester left. But far out. It's too long. In the grand scheme of things, its only a little bit of my life. Still. It feels like forever away.

I want out of this house, soon. We are nowhere near deposit ready, but we are so ready to have our own place. Things are done my in laws way, not ours.  I just want to put things/do things/leave things etc my way, how I want. I only wanted to be here 1 year. This November marks 2 years. The way things are going deposit-wise, it's looking like another 2 years. I don't know if I can do that. HOWEVER, if it does take that long, I will be (hopefully) registered and working for a year by then and it will be more money and decent hours of employment.

Sometimes it's hard to look that far into the future. The prize is there, just it's so hard to see.

I have started eating more healthy (around 85% paleo again) since the 1st of this month. I need to shift this weight. I want to remove 10kg by Christmas. That will bring me to a weight I will be comfortable with (that I've been trying to get to since 2008). I won't be in the 'healthy weight range' bracket that health professionals want you to be at, but I'll look and feel better.